This Is Not What I Planned On Writing This Morning

     We lost one of the great ones today. Her smiles. Her laughter. Her compassion. Her humor. Her love. Her light. Her light shone brightly. 

     I wanted to be her when I grew up. She was something I aspired to be. Her impact on me was eternal. 

    I will continue to think of her, as I often have over the years, with a smile on my face. 

    My love and prayers go out to her family and everyone who was blessed to have been touched by her. 

Pollyanna?

I was asked, today, if I always saw the good in people? To be honest, I didn't know how to answer that. I kept picturing Pollyanna in my mind, and I am certainly no Pollyanna. So, I looked over at my husband and he didn't seem to know how to answer the question either. Well, that certainly seemed to sway my answer toward the negative. I mean, if my own husband isn't sure.......

Tonight, I will watch some Pollyanna, take notes and play the Glad Game. And then grill my husband on what he really thinks of me. :)

Where Are Your Eyes?

This year has not been what I expected. It has been so much more. I have grown in ways that I didn't know were possible. I've witnessed miracles and blessings.....and love...so much love.

I have been striving this year to be known more for what I stand for than what I stand against. This has stretched me and challenged me greatly.

Every time I faced a storm, a question would rise on the inside of me. Where are your eyes? And I would realize, I was looking at those dark, swirling clouds. I felt the cold wind of fear and stinging rain of worry. My eyes were on the storm.

When I put my eyes on Jesus Christ, however, everything changed. I know longer saw darkness because I was looking directly into light. All I could feel was warmth and love and strength. The size of the storm had diminished to nothing. And I was no longer paralyzed in fear, I could walk on, closer and closer to the light, mine shining brighter and brighter.

It is amazing what all you can see once you have light to clear and illuminate your vision. I see more miracles now than ever. Why? Because my eyes are always drawn the light now.

I know there are terrible things going on in the world and in life. I choose not to focus on those things. It is too easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of the storm. Instead, I focus on Jesus, then His light can shine through me. You have to be close to the light in order to reflect it.

Your eyes show a reflection of your soul. So, what are you looking at? What are you reflecting?

Where are your eyes?

My Life in Pictures

I don't exist in photographs. I have no pictures documenting any of my pregnancies. No wedding photos. Not a family photo in sight for years.

I had challenged myself earlier in the year to take more personal photos. And I have done that. The only problem with being the photographer is that you are never on the side of the camera with everyone else.

I'm trying to do better. I want my children to have those pictures to remember me after I'm gone. Pictures are the tangible evidence of our memories. They make our memories a little brighter, a bit sweeter.

So, I am arming the family with cameras. We are going to photograph it all. And I will exist in the photographs. No longer as an observer, but as a key player.

Step in Faith

If He must keep coming back for me - it takes longer for the blessings, longer for the favor, longer to see and revel in His Glory. And I will miss out on so much because I stopped moving forward, stopped taking those steps in faith. From a run, to a crawl, to immobility....and finally, sleep. Awaken!

I was shown an opportunity. Took a step out in faith.

Was it ridiculous? Yes. Seemingly.
Did it feel like a giant leap? Yes.
Did it seem foolish? Most certainly.

But......God uses the foolish and the ridiculous for His Glory. And on His scale, what felt like a giant leap to me, was a mere baby step to Him. Which shows me - how much farther I can go, how much more He has for me....if I will only follow Him...a step in faith at a time.

Time Flies

Wow. It has been a really long time since I've blogged. This summer has been busy for me. The kids are finally back in school, so now I can write again. In peace. And quiet.

I bought a beautiful binder about a month ago. My intention was to get organized with a Home Management System. This would save me enormous amounts of time. It sat on my desk, empty, for about two weeks. Almost completed, this is what the binder has done for me in terms of time management.

1. Spent three hours on Pinterest searching "home management binder" ideas.
2. Another two hours on Pinterest looking up Christmas decor ideas.
3. Since I was already on the computer, I checked facebook and emails for another hour.
4. An hour deciding on folders to put in my binder.
5. Forty-five minutes trying to get the printer to work.
6. Fifteen minutes on the phone with my husband complaining about the non-working printer.
7. Ten minutes berating myself once I discovered the printer was not hooked up to the computer.
8. One hour printing out the planner and special lists.
9. Twenty minutes staring at my paper, folder, binder mess covering the desk while my fingers massaged my temples.
10. Ten minutes mumbling about organization being overrated.
11. Almost ninety minutes trying to work with a difficult hole punch.
12. Thirty minutes actually putting the binder together.
13. Five minutes looking for a pen.
14. Fifteen minutes trying to find my glasses.
15. Ten days trying to decide what ranks important enough to be written in my beautiful planner. (I am not kidding. It's like the Seinfeld episode where Elaine determines who is sponge worthy)

One day I will get the hang of this.

Bri